


hand me my leather

by seatbeltdrivein



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Community: fanfic_bakeoff, Kinks, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-14
Updated: 2011-03-14
Packaged: 2017-10-16 23:32:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/170562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seatbeltdrivein/pseuds/seatbeltdrivein
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"It's a legitimate sex act!" Roy insisted.</p>
            </blockquote>





	hand me my leather

Roy's first act as Fuhrer was drawing up an edict and posting it in the bedroom. Ed tore it down and stuffed it in the tin where Roy kept the teabags.

"If you think I'm gonna act like a footstool just so you can get off, you've got another thing coming," Ed growled.

"It's a legitimate sex act!" Roy insisted.

"Footstool," Ed repeated. "The fuck d'you _get_ these things?"

"That's hardly important." Roy took the plates of food Ed handed him and sat down. Ed, scowling, took his seat across the table.

"I thought you wanted to be more adventurous," Roy continued, eyeing the hunk of meat on his place suspiciously.

"Roy Mustang," Ed said through gritted teeth, "the last time we tried to be _more adventurous_ , you put your back out for a week. You're fifty, not twenty. Get over it!"

Roy frowned at the table, thinking. "Well, _I_ might be fifty, but may I remind you that you're only thirty-six?"

"What's your point?" Ed asked.

"That I'm only as old as you let me act," Roy finished with a flourish. "Besides that, I think you'd make an excellent footstool."

"There isn't a single fucking thing sexy about footstools," Ed grumbled, jabbing his fork into his steak with a pointed viciousness.

"You could make anything look sexy—especially if you're naked while doing it."

"Stop while you're ahead," Ed warned him. "I'd hate to have to kill you in your sleep and flee the country."

"How is it that the moment I become ruler of the entire nation, you suddenly cease showing any respect to me at all?"

"I know how you like people patting you on the back," Ed explained. "I don't want it to go to your head. You're still just an idiot to me, Fuhrer Mustang."


End file.
